


your touch brought forth an incandescent glow

by eddiesdiaz



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Christopher Diaz Has Two Dads, First Kiss, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Getting Together, M/M, Misunderstandings, Soft Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV), but rather between their dumb asses and the rest of the firefam, plot twist though the misunderstandings are not between each other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-18
Updated: 2021-02-18
Packaged: 2021-03-17 12:48:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,298
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29350713
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eddiesdiaz/pseuds/eddiesdiaz
Summary: They don’t make a big deal of telling everyone the news — aside from Christopher, which Buck had been endearingly nervous about — because honestly, fundamentally, nothing changes. Everyone alreadyknows, really, so Buck and Eddie don’t feel like they need to broadcast it.They do their best to keep it professional at the station, for the most part, but sometimes their small but intimate touches seep into the work day without them even consciously realizing it.(Or, Buck and Eddie share soft touches at work, and the team notices and comes to conclusions.)
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV)
Comments: 37
Kudos: 758





	your touch brought forth an incandescent glow

**Author's Note:**

  * For [madamewriterofwrongs](https://archiveofourown.org/users/madamewriterofwrongs/gifts).



> Read on [Tumblr](https://eddiesdiaz.tumblr.com/post/643474740943650816)

They get together with a simple touch.

Eddie’s having the worst kind of day: the kind where it’s painfully, blatantly apparent that he’s a single dad, that he’s in this alone and there’s no one to lean on when he can feel things start to slip through the cracks. 

He’d been up half the night trying to make brownies for a class party at Christopher’s school — from scratch, because Chris gave him a guilt trip about always being the only kid in class that brings store-bought stuff — until he finally surrendered some time around 3:00 AM and his fourth barely edible batch. Then he’d overslept, making both Chris late for school and himself late for work, and leaving the kitchen in a state of absolute disaster he’d sworn he’d deal with first thing.

And now, with twenty minutes left until the end of his shift, he gets an SOS phone call from Christopher that he wasn’t anticipating. 

Eddie loves his kid more than anything, he really does, but he’s fucking _exhausted_ , and he feels like he’s hanging on by a thread. He takes a deep breath and slips his phone back into his pocket before collapsing onto the couch next to Buck with a frustrated huff.

“Everything okay?” Buck asks him, raising a concerned brow and turning his head to look at Eddie.

“Yeah, just…” Eddie sighs, running a hand through his hair. “Chris is at a friend’s house, and he was supposed to hang out there until later tonight while I ran some errands, but he’s not feeling well and he wants me to come pick him up.”

Buck hums, shooting him a sympathetic look. “No one else can do it?”

“Carla asked for the day off, and my family’s out of town. I can do it myself, it’s fine, I just…”

He hesitates for the briefest of moments, because he hasn’t actually discussed the nature of his “errands” with anyone. He’s been looking for a way to tell Buck, though, so he figures this is as good an opportunity as any.

“I’m supposed to have my first nonmandated therapy session tonight,” Eddie tells him. “I’ve already had to reschedule it, like, five times, and now I’m gonna have to postpone it _again_ and it’s—”

“No, you’re definitely not gonna do that,” Buck interrupts, shaking his head. “I’ll go get him.”

Eddie glances over at Buck, half expecting to find pity or judgment in his eyes, but Buck doesn’t look anything other than completely genuine in his desire to help. It makes Eddie’s heart ache in his chest a little, if he’s being honest. 

“You don’t have to do that, Buck, it’s no big deal,” he protests anyway.

“You’ve gotta stop telling yourself you’re not important, man,” Buck counters, without missing a beat.

Eddie ducks his head, staring pointedly at the floor as his cheeks go pink. Before Buck, no one ever bothered to push back when he put himself down, and he still doesn’t know how to respond to it. Mostly, he feels like he doesn’t deserve it.

Buck doesn’t let him hide, though.

“Eddie, hey,” he says gently, tucking his fingers under Eddie’s chin and tilting his head back up so he can look him in the eye. “Let me do this, okay? I know Christopher’s always your number one priority, but we need to make sure we’re taking care of you, too.”

It’s an unbelievably soft gesture, and it feels achingly familiar despite the fact Buck’s never touched him quite like this before. Like he’s something precious, something that needs to be cherished and protected. 

What really gets him, though, is the _we_. It’s like Buck can read his mind, zeroes in on his deepest, darkest insecurities and casts them away without hesitation, easy as anything. It’s unspoken, but Eddie hears it loud and clear: _you’re not alone, you’ve got me_.

He gets lost in Buck’s eyes for a moment, staring into his own with an intensity he hasn’t felt in years, and before he even realizes what he’s doing, really, Eddie’s leaning in to brush their lips together softly. 

It’s barely anything — in fact, it’s probably the sweetest, gentlest kiss he’s ever had — but Buck’s grinning when they part, and suddenly all the broken pieces of Eddie’s heart start to gravitate back together again.

“Wait,” Buck says after a moment, eyebrows furrowing in that adorable way they do when he’s confused. “Just for the sake of clarity: you don’t thank Carla like that when she does you a favor, do you?”

Eddie snorts a laugh, shaking his head fondly. “No, Buck. Just you.”

And then it’s back: that beautiful, pure, made-of-actual-sunshine smile that Eddie has no idea what he did to deserve directed at him. 

“Cool,” Buck says simply, glancing around the loft to make sure there’s still no one around before he pulls Eddie in for another kiss, and that’s that.

Eddie comes home that night to a blissfully clean kitchen and Buck sitting on the couch with Chris cuddled into his side as they watch a movie, and it knocks the breath out of him for a moment: the overwhelming sense of safety, of comfort, of _family_.

When Buck tries to leave later, protesting that he doesn’t want to overstay his welcome, Eddie shuts it down and takes him by the hand, pulling him into bed with him instead. They fall asleep curled around each other, Buck slotting perfectly into place like the last puzzle piece Eddie hadn’t even realized was missing, and for the first time in so many years, he feels whole. 

They don’t make a big deal of telling everyone the news — aside from Christopher, which Buck had been endearingly nervous about — because honestly, fundamentally, nothing changes.

They’re still best friends, and they’ve always been close; close enough that everyone they know (and even people they don’t) constantly tease them about being a couple. Hen had listened to his pathetic pining on more than one occasion back when Buck was with Ali, when Eddie still didn’t even understand why he was so jealous, and Buck’s admitted that he’s had similar conversations with Chim and Maddie after a few too many beers on their family hangout nights. And Bobby...he’s had them pegged from the start, long before either of them figured it out for themselves. 

Everyone already _knows_ , really, so Buck and Eddie don’t feel like they need to broadcast it.

They do their best to keep it professional at the station, for the most part, but sometimes their small but intimate touches seep into the work day without them even consciously realizing it.

Like today, for instance: it’s the end of a shift, and the squad’s making easy conversation about their weekend plans while they change. Buck’s cuter than he has any right to be when he proudly announces he’s taking Christopher to the aquarium, and it’s more instinct than anything when Eddie seeks him out. He slings his bag over his shoulder on the way out and opens the locker room door for Buck, resting a gentle hand on the small of his back to guide him through the doorway. 

Buck smiles at him and then takes off running when he spots Karen and the kids here to pick up Hen, leaving Eddie to watch him fondly.

That is, until he hears someone clear their throat to his side and he looks over to find Chimney leaning against the firetruck, smirking at him in a way that tells Eddie he definitely saw the whole thing.

“Your heart eyes are showing, man,” Chim teases with an amused laugh.

“Are they?” Eddie asks, smiling softly as he watches Buck crouch down to talk to Denny with an excited grin. “He just...he makes me happy, you know?”

Chim softens at that, and Eddie’s a little surprised he gave up on the jokes so easily, if he’s being honest.

“You know he feels the same about you, right?” he says, looking at Eddie with nothing but absolute sincerity. “You and your kid are all he talks about, Eddie. He loves you.”

Eddie _does_ know; Buck tells him as much every day, says he’ll say it as many times as it takes to get Eddie to finally believe he’s good enough, but it’s nice to hear it from someone else nonetheless.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. You guys have something special, so please, for the love of god, don’t waste it,” Chimney tells him, nudging him with his elbow on his way out of the station.

It’s good advice, but it’s kind of a given, Eddie thinks, because there’s no way he’s ever going to let Buck go.

The next time it happens, Eddie swears it’s the longest day of his life.

It had been another sleepless night — this time, because nightmares kept waking Chris up every hour — and even though he eventually caved and called Buck in the middle of the night asking for help, Eddie still got up every time he heard Christopher’s cries. Buck told him he’d handle it, to go back to sleep, but Eddie’s never been able to stand by and do nothing when his kid’s upset. He needed to _be there_.

Pair the sleep deprivation with the slowest, most boring shift in the history of shifts (seriously, there’s only been one call in _seven hours_ ), and Eddie’s practically falling asleep on his feet. 

He’s done the dishes, cleaned out his locker, caught up on his reading, _and_ gotten a solid workout in when he finally relents and makes his way over to Buck, who’s sitting on the couch, scrolling through his phone. 

Eddie slips off his shoes before settling on the couch, pulling his legs into his chest and laying his head in Buck’s lap. Buck, for his part, just hums in contentment and instantly reaches for Eddie, running gentle fingers through his hair. 

He’s not quite asleep, but it’s a very close thing, when he hears someone else shuffle into the room and clear their throat pointedly. 

“You two look cozy,” Hen says, and even though Eddie’s eyes are closed, he can hear the teasing grin in her voice. 

“I just want to make sure he gets some rest,” Buck answers, voice soft. “He works so hard, and he’s exhausted, but he won’t admit it. He never gives himself a break.”

“That’s our Eddie,” she agrees with a chuckle. They’re both quiet for a moment, and then she adds, “You’re good for him, you know.”

He can’t see him, but Eddie would bet money that Buck’s blushing as he says, “I try to be. He deserves it.”

“He does, and he’s got it,” Hen tells him. “Trust me, Buck, you’re all he wants. All you have to do is show up.”

Suddenly Eddie’s overwhelmed with fondness for both of them, and it’s all he can do to keep pretending to be asleep instead of wrapping them up in a hug. 

“Thanks, Hen,” Buck says, voice thick with emotion.

“Yeah, yeah. Don’t start crying on me, Buckley,” she jokes playfully. “You can thank me by making me best woman at the wedding when you guys finally get your shit together, got it?”

Buck laughs at that, bright and happy, and Eddie swears he can feel his heart melt.

It’s not even a week later when Bobby calls him into the kitchen while he’s cooking lunch. 

“Hey, Harry’s been missing Christopher. He keeps asking me when he gets to see him again,” he says with an easy smile. “Any chance I can drop him off for a sleepover tonight?”

“Yeah, I think Chris would love that,” Eddie answers, nodding. “Hey, Buck?”

Before Eddie can even look around for him, Buck’s there, coming up behind him and into his space. He rests his hands on Eddie’s shoulders and pulls him back into his chest, hooking his chin over Eddie’s shoulder easily.

“What’s up?”

“Are you up for an extra kid in the house tonight?” Eddie asks, leaning his head against Buck’s. 

“Who, Harry?” Buck asks, nodding enthusiastically in Bobby’s direction when Eddie hums an affirmative. “Definitely. He’s always welcome to crash our movie nights.”

“I don’t think it’s crashing if he’s invited, and they’re probably gonna ditch us and our movie to do their own, much cooler thing,” Eddie points out, and he can feel the vibration of Buck’s answering laugh. 

“Guess you’ll just be stuck with me, then, Diaz.”

“Oh no,” Eddie teases, grinning. He finally looks back to Bobby and finds him watching intently as Buck brushes his thumb back and forth along Eddie’s shoulder in gentle strokes. 

“You know,” Bobby says, clearly aiming for casual but missing by a mile, “For what it’s worth, the three of you make a really beautiful family.”

That knocks the breath out of Eddie for a moment. It means a lot to have the person he looks up to the most reinforce what he’s already so sure of: that after so much struggling and so many mistakes, he’s finally got it right. 

“Bobby,” Buck chokes out, suddenly sounding impossibly flustered, “I’m not—”

And Eddie _hates_ that, hates the way Buck closes in on himself when he feels like he’s overstepping or coming on too strong, even though he never actually is.

“Don’t, Buck,” he interrupts, before Buck can get a chance to start spiraling. “You know you’re an honorary Diaz. Have been for years now.”

Eddie reaches up to cover Buck’s hand with his own, squeezing gently. Buck pulls him a little closer, and then the tension and doubt is gone as quickly as it came, dismissed with a quiet sigh of relief.

Bobby smiles at them and gives each of them a clap on the shoulder once they’ve drifted away from each other. He asks Buck to give him a hand with lunch, and as Eddie wanders away to leave them to it, he can just make out Bobby breaking out his serious, fatherly tone to tell Buck:

“Eddie’s right, Buck. You belong in that house with those boys, and he and Chris both know it. You can all be so happy together as soon as you believe it, too.”

Today is...it’s a living fucking nightmare, honestly. 

They lost a kid on a call; a kid with bright, innocent eyes, a kid not far from Christopher’s age, a kid that died alone because LA traffic kept his parents from getting to him in time. 

Although, “alone” isn’t entirely accurate. Buck held his hand the entire time, talked to him and kept him calm all while maintaining a brave face, even though the whole team could see it was tearing him apart. It wasn’t until he was officially gone that Buck broke, openly crying over his body. Eddie wasn’t faring much better, and a quick look around told him the rest of the team wasn’t either. It’s too close to home for all of them.

The ride back is silent, everyone processing their emotions on their own, but Buck and Eddie sit next to each other, pressed together from shoulder to knee, and Eddie clings to that pressure like a lifeline, uses it to ground himself. 

When they get back to the station, as soon as they’re off the truck and there’s a little more room to breathe, Buck reaches for him. 

“Eddie,” he murmurs quietly as he cups Eddie’s face in his hands and presses their foreheads together. 

Eddie lets out a shaky sigh as his hands go to Buck’s sides. They both let their eyes fall shut and then they just breathe together, slow and steady, in and out. 

He’s always grateful to have Buck with him at work, but he’s even more so at times like this; while everyone else has to wait until they get home to see their significant other and settle for a phone call in the meantime, Eddie can just reach out and instantly have that warm, reassuring comfort when he needs it most. He still aches to see Christopher, but with Buck by his side, he feels more steady. 

Eddie zones out for a minute or two, melting into the moment of him and Buck and how unbelievably safe he feels despite everything, until suddenly he’s shaken out of it by the sound of Hen’s voice. 

“Okay, I’m sorry, but we can’t just stand by and watch this anymore,” she says, gesturing to Bobby and Chimney. “Today was the worst day. The kind of day that makes you want to never take your family for granted ever again. Don’t you guys wanna, like...I don’t know, go home together, kiss Christopher, and hold each other close?”

Eddie looks over at her with raised eyebrows, because he honestly has no idea what she’s on about. 

“I mean...we were planning on it, yeah,” Buck says slowly, sounding every bit as confused as Eddie feels.

“Are you kidding me?” Hen asks, blinking at them in disbelief. 

Eddie pauses to share a look of complete confusion with Buck before answering.

“What do you mean? Of course we’re going home together.”

“Yeah, but when Hen says together, she means actually _together_ ,” Chim says pointedly. “Not this sad, pining, quasi-relationship you guys have got going on.”

“Okay, what the hell are you guys talking about? We _are_ together,” Buck says, taking Eddie’s hand in his own as if to prove his point.

At this, everyone’s eyes go wide, and Eddie can’t for the life of him understand why.

“Wait, _what_? Since when?” Hen and Chim somehow manage to ask in perfect unison. 

“I don’t know, like a month? Month and a half, maybe?” Eddie guesses with a shrug. 

“And you didn’t think that was something worth _mentioning to us_ at any point?” Hen questions. 

“We thought you knew!” Buck protests. “We haven’t exactly been subtle.”

“That’s our point, though. You’ve never been subtle,” Bobby points out. “You’ve been acting the same way you always have this past month.”

“Okay, well, excuse us for wanting to be professional,” Buck says. “What do you guys want us to do, make out in front of you? We’re at work.”

“Says the guy who used to have sex in the truck,” Chimney quips with a smirk.

And that...well, that’s news to Eddie.

“I’m sorry, he did what?” he asks, turning his head to look at Buck, who’s blushing bright red. 

“Okay, can we please not?”

“Evan Buckley, oh my god,” Eddie teases, grinning, because he can’t resist. “I hope you know I’m not that kind of guy.”

The whole team starts laughing at that, and Eddie can’t help but join in. It’s nice to be able to laugh again after such a terrible day, and even though Buck rolls his eyes and grumbles about everyone giving him a hard time, he smiles bright and fond when Eddie presses a kiss to his cheek. 

“So you guys are happy, then?” Hen asks with a smile once the laughter dies down. 

“We really are, yeah,” Eddie answers easily, because not only does he know exactly how he feels, he’s also 100% certain that Buck feels the same way, and that’s...goddamn, it’s a good feeling. 

“That’s all we ever wanted for you,” Bobby tells them, so kind and genuine it’s staggering, honestly. “You both deserve it.”

And then all three of them are wrapping him and Buck up in a big group hug, and Eddie basks in the warmth of it all. 

Eddie does take Hen’s advice about not taking your family for granted, though. That night, over pizza and video games with Chris, he asks Buck to move in with them so they can come home together, officially, forever. 

They send an announcement text to the group chat immediately afterwards, in the spirit of keeping everyone in the loop. 


End file.
